The Four Factors that Led Me to Westmar College

I am planning a return visit to Northwest Iowa -- this has long been on my list of things to do. It has been 40 years since I've been there. Am I anxious -- a little as things have changed so much. But I feel the need to acknowledge that I grew up so much at Westmar. I was a shy, naive country kid that never lived in a town before going to Westmar, and the community of Westmar College changed me to who I am today. 

Occasionally, you gotta recognize your roots to know where you are.

I recalled my high school senior year the other day about choosing a college. I only applied to United Methodist colleges and did not submit one application to a public college or university. I did want to apply to one public college in New Mexico, but my parents nixed that idea lol. I think being a UMC PK, applying to UMC colleges seemed to be the right thing to do; but, I really never had a conversation with my parents about college. It was up to me. My choice.

When the push came to shove about deciding where I was going, three colleges were left: Baker University, Southwestern College, and Westmar. Two colleges in Kansas and one in northwest Iowa.

Baker dropped out early for all of us -- they weren't that interested in me and offered a really nonchalant financial aid package. I did run into quite a few Baker students when I began graduate school at KU in Lawrence as Baker was just down the road -- by whom I ran across, I really was not a good fit for Baker four years earlier.

We visited Southwestern College first in Winfield, Kansas. I was not impressed. And I don't recall any excitement from my parents either.

Then came Westmar. Did they pull out all of the stops for us or what! But it was two states away and a bit further than either parent wanted me to be.

Four factors influenced my decision to go to Westmar:

1.  A very persistent and personable Director of Admissions. Valda Embree called me several times and sent me letters. I felt welcomed.

2. By far, the best financial aid package given with an academic scholarship, a PK discount, a large scholarship for Kansas residents attending Westmar, and much more. 

3. During my overnight visit placement at Westmar, Valda was smart. She placed me with a student on the 1st Floor, Wernli Hall. Not only welcomed but felt included too. Wernli became my college home for 4 years (minus my off-campus studies in D.C.)

4. And then the deciding factor, one that I did not share with my parents because it might have hurt their feelings some. This was before the advent of the Web and social media. Westmar provided the opportunity to escape the bubble-wrapped PK fishbowl that many PKs find themselves in. I could become who I wanted because no one knew who I was before attending Westmar. That freedom set me on my life journey.

Now, I have the opportunity to say goodbye to Westmar College, which died in 1997. Westmar alumni numbers have been dwindling the past 25 years as no new alumni have been added. For me, closing the chapter.

Remembering Mom: Lola Hunter

November 2023 was supposed to be a fun family month. Daughter came down for two weeks to encompass celebrating her mother's birthday and to celebrate the holiday and son and daughter in law were to join all of us in the holiday celebration as well. Well those things did happen but for me it was not the joyful moment I envisioned. 

My mom died November 13, 2023.

It's really hard when both parents are gone. When your beautiful mom leaves this journey, it is hard anyway. Making it a double-whammy when there's no parent left to connect to your past. I moved along rudderless for days afterwards. I enjoyed moments the best I could. 

What made it harder for me was that my mom and I did not connect on the same level as my dad and I. I think that is true with any child, there are different connections with either parent. For mom and me, it was a lot of support. She might not have always understood everything I was doing, or what I was researching, but she always supported me. She was the only one in my family of five who did not graduate from college, but she was so smart about things that we encounter in life. That silent, personal touch can go by unnoticed in life until it's no longer there. Then there's the discovery of a void from it not being there.

Before I present the text of my remarks at mom's burial service, there are two things that I remember and connect to with so much emotional attachment.

Mom told me while she was shopping for shoes for me that she wanted to buy shoes for each of us. Her childhood was really really hard. Born in the heart of the Great Depression and Dust Storms, mom learned to save and not spend. She said that shoes were in her family a scarcity. She wore shoes that were worn out, did not fit her feet, just to have something to wear to school. I was in middle school when I heard this, but I was still aware enough to feel how hard that statement was to make for her. It made me feel very grateful for what I had.

Mom was a creative person. She could draw, she could paint.  She could make a pattern out of drawing and bring it to fruition into a painting. A creative person feels a lot more and what is affecting them.  Creativity was an outlet from that. I am grateful for Mom showing me without even knowing it that creativity is a release point along this journey in life.

One of my favorite pictures of mom and me. Picture was from 1985 - I still in my permed hair and still skinny.

 I read the following remarks at mom's burial service. 

Our mother died on Monday morning.

November 13, 2023.

Which would have been our Dad's 90th birthday. Birth and Death. For us, we will remember a birth and death on the same day. 

Our parents in November 1965 had their birthdays connected to death. In 1965, Dad's dad, or our grandfather Hunter, died on my mom's birthday; and five days later, my Mom's dad, or our grandfather Taylor, died on my Dad's birthday.

November birthdays for our parents were never the same again.

My mom and dad lived together in a long, loving marriage -- their lives intertwined with faith, hope, and love. That faith, hope, and love helped my mom transition effortlessly to be a preacher's wife. She connected with church members with her smile that greeted you before the words hello. She connected by being the same person she always was.

Intertwined faith, hope, and love.

Even though each one of her children left home for college and on our life journeys, she always supported us -- made sure we received our birthday cards each year -- and loved us no matter where we were. 

Our mom loved to be creative--painting, coloring, and she loved to draw and sketch. 

We are here today to celebrate her life -- a life filled with love, joy, and happiness -- and that she loved us so much, had so much hope for us, and always had faith in us.

Love you Mom

TNPTA 2023 Student Awards Ceremony

My last official event as Tennessee PTA president was the Student Awards Ceremony held on June 3rd at the Brentwood Public Library. The library in Brentwood is just a beautiful, inviting building. Nonprofits can rent the huge meeting room.

Meeting me there from the board of directors were Vice President Larry Davis -- it was his show and he arranged all of the things necessary for it to happen -- Bala Ramanchandran over the reflections arts, Charles Everett, treasurer, and our office administrator, Tonya Cambre. And G came along too!

We had a great turnout of over 100+ people! Our emcee drove from Knoxville to present: Mike Hammond. This was not his first time emceeing our student awards ceremony!

I enjoy speaking in front of large crowds so I was in my moment!  

I was so pleased that Charles Everett, who also served as council president for the United Shelby County Council, led the way to have our long-time Reflection Chair, Bala Ramachandran, to receive a life time achievement award.  It has long been my long time held personal belief that anyone elected to or currently serving on the Executive Committee should be a life time achievement award recipient from the state if their local unit or council unit was not going to present the honor. I also believe that if a board member, especially one after 4 years, did not have one should get one too. Thankfully, the Council stepped up!

And wow was Bala surprised! It was so good to see this award given to Bala.

The ceremony was well received. Our backdrop was in heavy use by parents and caregivers!  I was very pleased that this was my last event -- an event celebrating our children and youth across the state of Tennessee!